Do you ever have those kinds of days (or weekends) when you are just so tired that it feels like you’re not even alive? Like maybe you had a big project due, or had to work major overtime, or your oldest son had a friend sleep over night for the first time? As you may have guessed, my oldest son had a friend sleep over for the first time, and man alive I feel tired.
It wasn’t even so much that they were really noisy or slept really late (which they were and they did), but I guess I just couldn’t sleep because I kept thinking that something was going to happen in the middle of the night and I’ll have to jump into action (not sure what would constitute me to ‘jump into action’ though… perhaps an attack from an alien species?). I was just on edge and restless with anticipation all night, and when nothing happened (including a lot of sleep), then I was just left with a really groggy day.
So I wasn’t exactly looking forward to taking the kids out for the day. I wasn’t looking forward to dealing with their crying and fighting (which happened), their complaining (which happened), and their nonsensical and borderline maniacal laughing (which happened probably on both our parts). But I went anyway and realised something…
…I love my kids. I like their friends. I like hanging out with them while they still let me, and I will miss it when I become ‘that dad’ who embarrasses and is annoying (and don’t you dare say that happened already).
So what I’m saying is that although I was tired as heck, there was joy in spending time with them. At the end of the day I felt good because we were able to go to the park, I felt like we had some parenting wins in defusing some conflicts, and the smiles on their faces made it all worth it.
But still… I’m tired.
The readings for next week are:
The dead brought back to life. I’m always a little scared when texts like these come around, because while believing that God has the power to raise the dead is pretty cool and all, the fact that our dead loved ones don’t come back to life is actually disheartening. I mean, Jesus raised his buddy Lazarus, why doesn’t he raise my grandmother? God brought back to life an entire valley of dead people, why not bring back the multitude of people we’ve lost for various reasons? Each one of us have lost someone special, so why doesn’t God bring life in that death?
The things is that God does bring life in the face of death, it just doesn’t take shape in someone being alive again. But it is there, for God brings to us life in the shape of joy, peace, and love. There is life found in community and the relationships we have with each other. There is life in the time we spend with our friends and family. There is life in the memories of those we have lost, in that they continue to live in our hearts.
This isn’t to belittle the death of anyone by any means, but it is to say that death does not have the last word. It is to say that when we have difficult times, they will pass and we will feel joy again. It is to say that although we can feel as though we are dead (through fatigue or otherwise), that God is still present among us, revealing to us the peace and love found in each other, in relationships, and in community.
May this peace and love reign in our hearts, our minds, and our lives both now and forever. Thanks be to God!
Have a great week, everyone!